Sunday, 17 May 2015

The definition of a GOOD day!

‘Today was a GOOD day! All went well, nothing unusual or unexpected happened. I ate at the right times, I snoozed at the right times, went out at the right time…. All very satisfactory!

One thing that most people should know about felines, is that we value a well-established routine. Routines are good. They make us feel safe. 
The moment Humans start talking about trips, our hair stands on end. 
The moment a Human comes with a pot of paint, a roller and starts taking things off the wall, we go into hiding. Renovations are NOT appreciated. The sound of drills, saws and vacuum cleaners make us run a mile.

Redecorations are slightly different though. Bringing home a new printer or side table is quite all right. They usually come with boxes and bubble wrap, which seem to be irresistible. The Christmas decorations also have a great appeal. In fact, they are very dear to many of us. We greatly enjoy the baubles and tinsel, and will gladly assist you with their arrangement.

My own routine goes like this: the first thing is waking the humans from their slumber, to make it perfectly clear that I need some biscuits. It is a very simple procedure, yet they are sometimes very slow to comprehend.
Basically, what I do is: I jump on the bed, walk all over them, make cute, chirrupy sounds and bump their faces. I do not settle down for a cuddle. Instead, once there is some reaction (any ‘hrrmph” will do), I jump back down and move towards the door. If they don’t follow I repeat the whole sequence.
After I get the desired response (aka biscuits), I go out for a stroll. About an hour or so later I make sure to be back home, because by now the humans will be preparing their breakfast. I just know that if I'm present and sound cute, some tasty little snacks like bits of cheese, butter and ham will come my way. You may call this my 'second breakfast'. They seem to call it 'Titbits'. 
Indeed, this day bits of cheese and ham found their way to me. After that, I always have a nice, long snooze in the bedroom, for which I resurface somewhere late in the afternoon. By then it is time for our afternoon stroll. The Humans are slow, but they are good company. They admire my sprints for one thing, and are ridiculously easy to beat. Today, they both walked with me, wearing their big boots and sipping from glasses of bubbly stuff. 
The sun was getting low in the sky. To me, this indicates time for my dinner. I make sure the Humans don’t forget it, by miaowing, and jumping up and down. My personal menu is very short:
Tinned casserole or tinned tuna.
Today is was casserole.
Evenings are the right time to go out; I check the roof or scout the area for vermin. By the time I want to come back in, I just hang in the window screen of the bedroom. It seems to make it clear to the Humans that I want to come back in, and they will open the door. After that, I join them in the bedroom for the night.

So, today all has gone well. No adventure, no strange cats, no snakes, no strange food, and the Humans behaved themselves. In short, a perfect day!’