"Today is a good day. Yesterday was a fantastic day. Yesterday was the day I almost caught a bird. And guess what? Today, my humans rewarded me. They told me how wonderful I am, and gave me a collar with some silver, shiny, tinkling balls on it.
I know for a fact that when The Elegant Lady wants to feel pretty, she puts on a collar around her neck as well. They call it a necklace, I think. The Gentle Man always tells her how beautiful she looks, and she just shines.
Muppet has a collar as well. He must have done some great deeds in the past. I used to be afraid of him. He really didn't like me. But then I realised that I could hear him coming from miles away, so I could hide. However, over time he mellowed, and now we sometimes have a chat.
I asked him about his collar once. I was wondering whether it was irritating to hear this tinkling sound with every move you make. Muppet just looked at me with his big eyes and said: 'Balls? Tinkling? Noise? What are you talking about?' Catwoman did say he's not that bright. I mean, how can you miss the fact that you are wearing a collar, and that you are tinkling all the time? On top of that, how can you forget that you were rewarded somewhere along the line? Never mind, what matters is that I have one too!
To be honest though, this day is not even over yet and my enthusiasm is already starting to wane. I do not like this sound that follows me everywhere. It is a high sound, but not quite like the squeaking of a mouse, or the chirping of a bird. "Tinkling" is the best way to describe it. Very annoying. Doesn't quite feel like a reward anymore. And when I come to think of it, those pretty collars The Elegant Lady wears make no sound at all. I don't think this is fair. I am going to make my sentiments known and sit right here, where The Gentle Man does not want me to sit. On a silver thing. Flat and rectangular, with a shape of an apple on it - a convenient reminder to centralise the position of one's posterior, perhaps? He really hates it when I even come near it. So I am just going to sit right on top of it, and plot my revenge..."